Quotes from Albert Ellis

Self-esteem is the greatest sickness known to man or woman because it's conditional.

I think it's unfair, but they have the right as fallible, screwed-up humans to be unfair; that's the human condition.

I had used eclectic therapy and behavior therapy on myself at the age of 19 to get over my fear of public speaking and of approaching young women in public.

By not caring too much about what people think, I'm able to think for myself and propagate ideas which are very often unpopular. And I succeed.

We teach people that they upset themselves. We can't change the past, so we change how people are thinking, feeling and behaving today.

If something is irrational, that means it won't work. It's usually unrealistic.

The easy way out is often just that-the 'easy' way out of the most rewarding lifestyle.

I regret that I've been so busy with clinical work that I haven't been able to spend much time on experiments and outcome studies.

I'm very happy. I like my work and the various aspects of it - going around the world, teaching the gospel according to St. Albert.

In the old days we used to get more referrals, because people had insurance that paid for therapy. Now they belong to HMOs, and we can only be affiliated with a few HMOs.

The attitude of unconditional self-acceptance is probably the most important variable in their long-term recovery.

Being assertive does not mean attacking or ignoring others feelings. It means that you are willing to hold up for yourself fairly-without attacking others.

The more sinful and guilty a person tends to feel, the less chance there is that he will be a happy, healthy, or law-abiding citizen. He will become a compulsive wrong-doer.

Many psychoanalysts refused to let me speak at their meetings. They were exceptionally vigorous because I had previously been an analyst and they were very angry at my flying the coop.

Whatever may be, I am still largely the creator and ruler of my emotional destiny.

Failure doesn't have anything to do with your intrinsic value as a person.

The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president. You realize that you control your own destiny.

To err is human; to forgive people and yourself for poor behavior is to be sensible and realistic.

By honestly acknowledging your past errors, but never damning yourself for them, you can learn to use your past for your own future benefit.

The art of love... is largely the art of persistence.