Quotes from Terry Pratchett

Good. Now…if you trust in yourself…" "Yes?" "…and believe in your dreams…" "Yes?" "…and follow your star…" Miss Tick went on. "Yes?" "…you'll still get beaten by people who spent their time working hard and learning things and weren't so lazy. Good-bye.

It had to be Death. No-one else went around with empty eye sockets and, of course, the scythe over one shoulder was another clue.

These days everybody used the clacks, even little old ladies who used it to send him clacks messages complaining about all these newfangled ideas, totally missing the irony.

You trust him? he said. No, said Hastur. Right, said Ligur. It's be a funny old world, he reflected, if demons went round trusting one another.

But we might go to war to keep some damn island that's only useful in case we have to go to war, right?

Susan's gotta poker, you know, it said, as if anxious to be helpful. WELL, WELL. INDEED. MY GOODNESS ME. I fort- thought all of you knew that now. Larst- last week she picked up a bogey by its nose. Death tried to imagine this. He felt sure he'd heard the sentence wrong, but it didn't sound a whole lot better however he rearranged the words.

Do you know where 'policeman' comes from, sir? ... 'Polis' used to mean 'city', said Carrot. That's what policeman means: 'a man for the city'. Not many people knew that. The word 'polite' comes from 'polis', too. It used to mean the proper behaviour from someone living in a city.

Roland was staring at Tiffany, so nonplussed he was nearly minused.

If the abnormal goes on long enough it becomes the normal. It was just that, when you came to explain it to a third party, it sounded odd.

It doesn't take a lot to interest goats.

Of course, many people in the universe have also had the misplaced belief that they can safely ignore gravity, mostly after taking some local equivalent of dried frog pills, and that has led to much extra work for elementary physics and caused brief traffic jams in the street below.

He knew that they all knew a lot more than he knew, and was quite happy knowing this.

Building a temple didn't mean you believed in gods, it just meant you believed in architecture.

The snow had done what even wizards and the Watch couldn't do, which was clean up Ankh-Morpork. It hadn't had time to get dirty. In the morning it'd probably look as though the city had been covered in coffee meringue, but for now it mounded the bushes and trees in pure white.

The wizards, such of them who were still on their feet and conscious, were rather surprised to see that Death was wearing an apron and holding a small kitten.

KEEP IT SAFE. IT'S A FUTURE AS WELL AS A PRESENT.

There may be a lot of things I'm not good at, thought Vimes, but at least I don't treat the punctuation of a sentence like a game of Pin the Tail on the Donkey…

Les choses ne nous arrivent pas, c'est nous qui arrivons aux choses

He glanced at the sun which, old professional that it was, chose that moment to drop below the horizon.

He ached all over. It wasn't just that his brain was writing checks that his body couldn't cash. It had gone beyond that. Now his feet were borrowing money that his legs hadn't got, and his back muscles were looking for loose change under the sofa cushions.

Most people have some means of filling up the gap between perception and reality, and, after all, in those circumstances there are far worse things than gin.

Does not happen!

Young Sam looked solemn for a moment and then said, I think I'll let Mr. Whistle do the being scared and then it won't bother me.

Do my thoughts just dream of me?