Quotes from Terry Pratchett

All the higher life forms scythed away, just like that." "Terrible." "Nothing but dust and fundamentalists.

That's sarcasm! You can't talk to me like that! You're just a servant! That's right. And so are you.

He couldn't remember having been seventeen; it was something that must have happened to him while he was busy. But it made him feel like he imagined it felt like when you were seventeen, which was like having a permanent red-hot vest on under your skin.

Even now, if he closed his eyes, he could still see the God of Evolution beaming so happily as the cockroach stirred.

Don't you talk to me about progress. Progress just means bad things happen faster.

WILL THERE BE A MOVIE, THEN? Neil likes to think that one day maybe there will, and Terry is certain that it will never happen. In either case, neither of them will believe it until they're actually eating popcorn at the premiere. And even then, probably not.

It sucks all the life right out of you, civilisation. It killed Old Vincent the Ripper, said Boy Willie. He choked to death on a concubine. There was no sound but the hiss of snow in the fire and a number of people thinking fast. I think you mean cucumber, said the bard. That's right, cucumber, said Boy Willie. I've never been good at them long words. Very important difference in a salad situation. said Cohen.

In Shadwell's simple world, anyone in sunglasses who wasn't actually on a beach was probably a criminal.

If you're too afraid of going astray you won't go anywhere

He'd have been a little bit happier if there'd been a demon or some sort of magic. Something simple and understandable. He didn't like the idea of meddling in science.

After all it was only wood. It'd rot in a few hundred years. By the measure of infinity, it hardly existed at all. On average, considered over the lifetime of the multiverse, most things didn't

I dinna trust that Q, that's a letter than has it in for a man. That's a letter with a sting, that one!

His voice gave out and he made several wavy motions with his hand, indicative of the shape of a woman who would probably be unable to keep her balance.

Deep in the leather armchair of his soul

REALITY IS NOT ALWAYS WHAT IT SEEMS, said Death. ANYWAY, IF THEY DON'T WANT TO SEE ME, THEY CERTAINLY DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU. THESE ARE ARISTOCRATS, BOY. THEY'RE GOOD AT NOT SEEING THINGS. WHY IS THERE A CHERRY ON A STICK IN THIS DRINK?

He'd learned in recent days, though, that rather than drown in uncertainty it was best to surf right over the top of it.

Universities are truly storehouses for knowledge: students arrive from school confident they know nearly everything, and they leave five years later certain that they know practically nothing. Where did the knowledge go in the meantime? In the university, of course, where it is dried and stored.

And Granny Weatherwax said, "I was younger when I last danced with you. But I am old now. There will be no more dances for me.

Rincewind let his breath out in a long sigh. It hurried off to hide somewhere.

It was central to Nanny Ogg's soul that she never considered herself an old woman, while of course availing herself of every advantage that other people's perceptions of her as such would bring.

Let the Queen do the fighting cos if you lose the King, you've lost everything.

People are what they do, and what they leave behind

Train? What do I know about training wizards? - Then send her to the university. - She's female! (...) - Well? Who says women can't be wizards?

Twas beauty killed the beast," said the Dean, who liked to say things like that. "No it wasn't," said the Chair. "It was it splatting into the ground like that.