Quotes from Amy Poehler

I think real life couples on screen are kind of deadly. For the most part, they're kind of deadly. You'd be surprised. Unless they're falling in love onscreen for the first time, you don't have quite the same energy for some reason.

Talented men are not threatened by talented women. They welcome them. And same way with real men.

You are all so good and I wish I were better. Now get out of here because I want to be where you are.

So, if you're doing good longform with talented people than you can step out and you can be the president or a construction worker and people accept that. It's really the roles you give yourself.

In the trial of Saddam Hussein on Tuesday, witnesses emotionally testified about the abuse the former dictator inflicted on them. Afterward, a tearful Saddam said, 'Ah, good times.'

If the goal is doing good stuff and working with your friends ... if you're doing that then you're succeeding.

Don't treat your heart like an action figure wrapped in plastic and never used.

Try putting your iPhones down every once in a while and look at people's faces.

President Bush threw out the first pitch Monday at Cincinnati's great American ball park. 18 Iraqis were killed.

Shame makes people abandon their children and drink themselves to death. It also keeps us from true happiness. An apology is a glorious release.

I hope and assume that every good comedy writer, no matter the age, has a moment where they discover how great Cheers is.

Girls, if a boy says something that isn't funny, you don't have to laugh.

Is there a word for when you are young and pretending to have lived and loved a thousand lives? Is there a German word for that? Let's say its schaufenfrieglasploit.

The great thing about taking big chances when you're younger is you have less to lose, and you don't know as much. So you take big swings.

I've always dreamed of growing up to be Amy Poehler.

Emotions are like passing storms, and you have to remind yourself that it won't rain forever.

I don't watch a lot of comedy. For relaxation and escape, I watch shows about how people survive bear attacks. Or old episodes of 'Law and Order,' the Benjamin Bratt/Jerry Orbach era.

There are so many people in the world with so little. Who cares why you decide to help?

When you're doing sketch comedy and you're pregnant, it's like wearing a giant sombrero in every sketch.

When I had a job catering, I catered a wedding for the Smashing Pumpkins bassist in Indiana. And I served Billy Corgan shrimp off a tray.

You deserve love and you'll get it.

I know enough now to know I know nothing.

Change the world by being yourself.

When I had a job catering, I catered a wedding for the Smashing Pumpkins bassist in Indiana. And I served Billy Corgan shrimp off a tray.