Quotes from Brene Brown

Sometimes the most uncomfortable learning is the most powerful.

We may not always have a sense of belonging on the recess playground or at a big, fancy conference, but in that moment we knew that we belonged where it mattered the most—at home.

But here's the dilemma: Why is "how-to" so alluring when, truthfully, we already know "how to" yet we're still standing in the same place longing for more joy, connection, and meaning?

We hustle for our worthiness by slipping on the emotional and behavioral straitjacket of cool and posturing as the tragically hip and the terminally "better than." Being "in control" isn't always about the desire to manipulate situations, but often it's about the need to manage perception. We want to be able to control what other people think about us so that we can feel good enough.

We know that vulnerability is the cornerstone of courage-building, but we often fail to realize that without vulnerability there is no creativity or innovation. Why? Because there is nothing more uncertain than the creative process, and there is absolutely no innovation without failure. Show me a culture in which vulnerability is framed as weakness and I'll show you a culture struggling to come up with fresh ideas and new perspectives.

setting boundaries is making clear what's okay and what's not okay, and why.

The pleasure of remembering had been taken from me, because there was no longer anyone to remember with. It felt like losing your co-rememberer meant losing the memory itself, as if the things we'd done were less real and important than they had been hours before.

Feeling stressed and feeling overwhelmed seem to be related to our perception of how we are coping with our current situation and our ability to handle the accompanying emotions: Am I coping? Can I handle this? Am I inching toward the quicksand?

Self-righteousness starts with the belief that I'm better than other people and it always ends with me being my very worst self and thinking, I'm not good enough.

There are too many people today who instead of feeling hurt are acting out their hurt; instead of acknowledging pain, they're inflicting pain on others. Rather than risking feeling disappointed, they're choosing to live disappointed.

But developing fundamental skills through disciplined practice is what gives players the grounded confidence to dare greatly.

schadenfreude is also born out of fear, powerlessness, and/or a sense of deservedness.

In another very unexpected discovery, my research also taught me that there's no such thing as selective emotional numbing. There is a full spectrum of human emotions and when we numb the dark, we numb the light.

Stephen Covey's sage advice still stands: "Seek first to understand, then to be understood.

when we don't care at all what people think and we're immune to hurt, we're also ineffective at connecting. Courage is telling our story, not being immune to criticism. Staying vulnerable is a risk we have to take if we want to experience connection.

Not only do moments of collective emotion remind us of what is possible between people, but they also remind us of what is true about the human spirit.

Remember too that sometimes we overlook our own strengths because we take them for granted and forget that they're special.

I swore that if I ever had the opportunity to publish a book again, I'd do it differently. I wasn't going to get dressed up in my new outfit and wait for someone to knock on my door and ask me about my work. I'd put on my shit-kickers and start knocking on doors myself.

But the truth is, we can't handle it. We are a nation of exhausted and overstressed adults raising overscheduled children.

Practicing spirituality is what brings healing and creates resilience. For me, spirituality is about connecting with God, and I do that most often through nature, community, and music. We all have to define spirituality in a way that inspires us.

I've never met a brave person who hasn't known disappointment, failure and even heartbreak.

Perfect and bulletproof are seductive, but they don't exist in the human experience.

Joseph Campbell's wisdom: "The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek.

If you trade in your authenticity for safety, you may experience the following: anxiety, depression, eating disorders, addiction, rage, blame, resentment, and inexplicable grief.